August 26, 2014

8 different reasons that make me a shopaholic

I've come here every day since my Ikea post. And for the past 6 days, I started a post and never finished.  I just have nothing good to say and I hate lackluster posts. On top of all that, I had all these post ideas planned, even the pictures to go with it but I'm SO damn lazy to upload them and edit them. Plus, I forgot my SD card in my other purse.  (I change my purse about 2-3 times a week).  I know it's in my Ballet Slipper Maise. I know that it's in the little cellphone pocket. And I also know that it is home in it's designated spot in my Target Cube Organizer. For $40 bucks, it really is the perfect purse organizer. But dammit. I really wanted to share my birthday with you all! I took the most adorable photos of my new Fall items that I got. UGH!

So for today, I'm going to vent about how I am a shopaholic.

1. Last weekend, we went to Ashley Furniture hoping to leave with a loveseat.  Not only did we leave with a loveseat, but also an entire bedroom set and new mattress.

2. And of course because we got a new love seat, I've been searching for the most perfect side table, ever. Insert the cutest side table ever, thank you #Marshalls.

3. So now that I have my side table, it's only normal to get a new lamp too?  In all fairness to my poor wallet, we did throw away this old side table we had, that had a lamp attached to it.  It did us good for 5 years in our place, but it was time to say goodbye to the Grand-mama type side table, and hello to a more modern style (where a lamp isn't ATTACHED).  I did find a lamp by the Marshall's during the same trip I got the table. 

4. I have my side table, lamp, and 2 new frames (come on, did you think I wouldn't get them?) you know that I need to paint the back room, and bedroom too, right? Oh, well I did that. All. Weekend. Long.  In fact, I was so impatient that I went to Lowe's Friday evening picked out paint based solely on the paint card and said YOLO (my life motto lately) and rolled with it (ha ha, no pun intended. Rolled it, as in I rolled the paint onto the walls, haha get it?? I'm so funny.)  I really have no time to hmm and haw over samples.  I told the paint man my life story about living in the house for 5 years with no updates to my bedroom, the contractor "tan" walls and how they aggravated me, and my new bedroom collection, hence me ordering the paint.  He was quite interested and told me that Ashley furniture sucked unless it was the Majesty version or some shit like that.  I rolled my eyes at him and told him I got it on a good deal and could give two shits if it was made in China because I've been sleeping on a full size bed with a rolly-poly for the past four years and it was time for an upgrade. And then I left. P.S. I need to lift more weights because the walk from the cashier to my car was rough. Two gallons of paint is no joke. Side note: 1 Gallon for my bedroom and 1 Gallon for the back room. Color: Valspar Aquatic Edge
This is not my bedroom but gives you an idea of the color.
5. These shoes, inspired by this outfit post from this blog, turquoise & teale

6.  This will be mine in a few short weeks. The Neverfull MM in Damier Ebene.

Ok, Ok calm your horses. I didn't buy a REAL one. Please. Do you think I would actually spend over $1000 on a coated canvas bag? No. But doesn't stop me from getting a fake one. P.S. I don't care if you think its tacky. But whatever, add it to my bill!

7. Glass pumpkins, Annalee dolls and "The Witch is In" decor.
Really Homegoods? Is it REALLY necessary to taunt me in 5 aisles of Fall and Halloween decor goodness? I wish I had a picture, but I don't. 

8. Kindle Paperwhite, KS and Tom Brady. Holy shit, I just wrote Eli Manning and had to go back and delete that.  Our 5 year "dating" anniversary is in two days and we got each other a gift. It is important to remember these milestones! Every year, Michael and I also celebrate our "getting engaged" date by going out to dinner in the same restaurant that we went to that night.  It's also a plus because it was the day BEFORE Valentine's Day, so it's never busy! Anyway, I'm getting off track here. Michael likes the New England Patriots. I (kind of?) like the Giants.  If he knew I mixed Tom Brady up with Eli he would probably shake his head in shame with me!  I got him a real official Jersey for the start of the football season (he got me the KS bag, well I got it, and he's giving it to me ha).  And my birthday was just last week and he got me a Kindle!! So exciting, but so $$$ right there.

So there you have it. Can I get any more out of control?

From now on, I am not entering Marshall's, Homegoods, TJ Maxx, Target, or anywhere else that I can do damage. This will be me:

I can do this. I'll start with the month of September.  Keep your fingers crossed for me.

August 20, 2014

"We have 72 in stock"

I really think it's about time for me to share my really ridiculous Ikea story. And to show you some decent (see: crappy iphone) pictures.

Once upon a time I went to Ikea in search of pink magazine file holders. I knew that they had light pink from visiting in the past so I figured those would do just fine.  Little did I know, as I rounded the corner into the Home Organization department, would I spy the most perfect, bubblegum pink magazine file holders on display.  I think my heart nearly skipped a beat because I was so thrilled that it would match my cube decor.  I beelined straight for them, to find them completely sold out. They only had the paper boxes in stock in the pink. I pouted. I was upset. I drove all the way up there to buy them, and they were all gone. No worries, there were about 10 of them put together (on display) so I took two down, and figured I would buy those.  No big deal right?

Wrong.  First, since I decided to buy those, I didn't see if they had a sticker on them, so I took an unopened, wrapped version in the yellow. My friend and I made our way through the rest of the store, and I found the perfect desk lamp and headed down to the register area to pay.  First of all, I want to let you know that this was a Wednesday night.  Second, they had four registers open (a lot, for them) and there were at minimum 10 people deep on each line.  This was going to be fun. My mom had texted me to pick up the chocolate cookies and raspberry cookies that they sell.  My hands were so full (of course I found other crap along the way that I didn't need) so I said, let me get this stuff, drop it in the car, and I'll run back in to pick up the cookies (and these potato cake things SO GOOD).  No big deal. (The chocolate cookies were right by the register by the way...)

So I get to the register, the worker clearly hates her life and doesn't want to be working that night so I sensed her attitude right from the start.  I explained that I wanted to buy these pink magazine files, but they didn't have any wrapped ones in the boxes so I brought these two down, but brought the yellow one with the scan code in case she needed it. She didn't like this.  She proceeded to ask me where I got these (pink ones) from. I said, I don't know, wherever you have them all. Then read on below for the rest of the convo. She will be represented by a C, for cashier, and L for me, Lauren.

C: "The Home organization department?!!"
L: "Yeah, on this floor."
C: "No, these are displays, you didn't get them from there. Where did you take these from? A floor model?"

I was getting really pissed at this point...

L: "Can I buy these or not?
C: "No, I can't sell these to you I will get fired."  
L: "What the hell do you mean you'll get fired? You can't sell me these because they are display items? "
C: "Only the person from the home organization department can release these. I can call her if you want me to [and then gives me the devil eyes]"
L: "Yes, call her. I drove all the way up here for them"

She phones, whispers in the phone facing away from me. I had wondered if she even was really on the phone.

C: "She just checked and told me they have 72 of these in stock. I can have someone bring them down for you" (with an attitude she tells me this I might add)
L: "This is honestly ridiculous, if you have them in stock, why can't you just give me these? You can put two more together. I'm not walking all the way back there, and at this point I'm holding up the line for someone to bring them down here. Forget it"

So then, Ms. Cashier lady's ghetto-ass friend comes down saying "Yeah I saw a bunch of those in stock. They are up there"

And I just attitudely responded "Yeah, I'd really love to see that because I searched all over the place".

So I paid for my items, sans pink magazine holders and left. So at this point I was so wound up over these dumb ass magazine files that I gave my stuff to my friend and asked her to hold on, and I was going to just get the potato cakes and cookies by the food court and then we could leave.  Well, did you know, they had the potato cakes, and the raspberry cookies by the food court, but no where in sight where these damn chocolate cookies.  Oh, I know because they were back by the freaking cash register that I just came from.  So I marched back over there, got the cookies and walked right past the register, the cashier yelling at me on the way that I had to pay for them.  I ignored her, took my stupid ass cookies and potato cakes and paid at the food court and went on my merrily (aggravated) way.  I really was questioning whether or not they had these stupid pink magazine files like they said, 72 of them... so we dropped our stuff in the car and ran back through the store.

Went back to the home organization department, no where in sight. This is when my story can wrap up because it's getting long, or I can go on to explain the shit I went through with this woman. I will give you the abbreviated version, I know your eyeballs are tired at this point.  I found her, and asked her "Hey you, I want those pink magazine file holders. Where are they"

"We are out of stock. The pink is all sold out."

[crickets. . . ]

"No way in HELL are you sold out of those pink ones. I just came from the cashier who SPOKE to YOU on the phone and YOU told her that you had 72 in stock"

Lady in dept: "No no no, You gave me number for yellow so I check yellow and we have 72 yellow".

That went on for about 5 minutes. I couldn't let go because she kept telling me that I"M THE ONE who gave her the number when I corrected her each time saying that it was the dumb ass at the cash register.  There was a problem communicating because english was not her first language.  She really was the sweetest lady but I was so revved up from the dumb ass cashier that I honestly couldn't cut this poor woman some slack.  But the "You gave me this number" comment just ate away at me. I had to leave. I was making a scene and never in my life have I been one to make a scene.

So that turned into a longer version, but now, long story short, I have them in my desk. Thank you Amazon Prime.

How did I do with the decor? I wish I decided to clean my desk up a little bit prior to just snapping these pictures, literally.  I love it. I'm known as the Pink Lady on the floor. :)

August 18, 2014

Inappropriate Instagram hashtags

Blogging is a big heavy cloud over my head lately.

I really miss it SO much, but I just don't feel like doing it.  I really think it is because I'm not fully settled into my new workplace, getting to know the area, and don't have my groove going yet. Once this happens, I really know that I will be back here religiously.  It's really the only website that I constantly return to for almost 3 years (Sidenote: I started blogging in the summer of 2011). Wow, so long ago!

Anyway, I have a spare 2 hours while my boss is away, that I can hang around here for a little. But surprisingly, I have a lot to do since Friday afternoon when I left at 12:30. I can't believe I am about to write this, but I can honestly say I'm ready to say "goodbye" to this summer.  I don't know what it is lately but the traffic in Jersey has sucked majjjjooorrrrr ass going home on Fridays leaving at noon.  I can't even imagine what it would be like at rush hour.  I guess because we are all "Jersey Strong" and all that jazz, everyone is trying to bring business back to the beaches since they are finally better for the most part since Sandy.

This weekend went way to fast.  They don't usually but I felt like my Sunday morning coffee ritual rolled around rather quickly. Actually, it rolled right on by since I didn't get up until 10am!! 

I can't really remember what I did Friday besides getting new exhaust system on my car and battling the traffic to get there.  This is a new system that takes me back to my accident back in May.  They told me the official "Hyundai" parts were back-ordered for approximately 3 months.  I decided that I was going to call the shop since I haven't heard.  They tell me "Oh, they are in. Why don't you come in and have them switched out ? (they gave me temporarily crappy exhaust in the meantime).  Of course I answered, Sure!! But really I was thinking to myself, when the F were they going to call me and tell me??

Saturday, again the day was somewhat of a haze but at nighttime we met up with our friends and went to 9th Avenue Pier in Belmar. It was ADORABLE.  Very crowded, because it was the absolute most perfect evening weather you could ask for, but I would go back there.  My coworker told me they didn't have the best food, but I beg to differ.  I ordered the Baja Fish Tacos and Loaded Potato Chips (smothered in pepper jack cheese, and pico de gallo).  The fish tacos came out with some kind of sauce all over it and I had a minor freak out inside, but decided YOLO and ate it regardless of what it was.  I still don't know, but didn't care. They were so great! We also got the cutest little buckets (not my photo, i searched "9thavepier" on instagram) of drinks, which were $15.00 but it was a really decent sized drink. Me and Rachel shared THREE OF THEM.  WHAT!? And of course, I wasn't feeling it till the very end. It really hit me. Lucky I didn't wake with a hangover on Sunday. I have a picture, on my camera, who does that anymore? Of course I don't have the sim card with me!

So Sunday finally rolls around and we decided to take a ride to the new Ashley Furniture in Toms River. We have been back and forth with getting a small loveseat for the backroom since we moved our original one to the front living room.  Now, in the back, there is just a giant chair and that's it as far as seating goes.  The backroom is really nice and it sucks that we can't have anyone else sit down in there. Well, anyway, if you saw yesterday on Instagram, I uploaded a pic of our new bedroom set!! We go in there for a loveseat, and we come out with a 7 piece bedroom set (well okay, we got the loveseat too).  The bedroom set was the first thing I laid my eyes on and I instantly fell in love.  Michael did as well.  The price was just right, and they had a scratch off sale. to take an additional 30, 40, or 50% off. Of COURSE, we got 50% off, and 50 months financing with 0% interest and free delivery to house.  Who wouldn't pass that deal up? It was all just too awesome.  We got the numbers and told him we would be more comfortable measuring the rooms first prior to putting deposit down.  I think he was literally shocked when I phoned him an hour later telling him we were on our way back and to start the paperwork.  I'm guessing a lot of people always say "we'll come back, we promise!" Lol. 

Anyway, if you recall, I briefly had a picture up of the bedroom set that is soon to be ours, but then took it down. Why? you may ask?  Well, first of all, I started getting a lot of new followers.  I didn't really understand, but kinda just shrugged and went along with it.  Then random people started liking my pics, and I really couldn't figure out what the spike in my instagram was. Well, the caption of the picture said  something like this: "Soon to be ours! Finally upgrading our full size to a queen size bed! #adults"   Well.  Guess what I decided to do? I clicked on #adults and was instantly greeted by the most disturbing images I've ever laid my eyes on in social media. Don't do yourselves any favors and look that hashtag up.  Let's just say that I was seeing a lot of privates. And a little more. Gag.  So I decided, ehhhh I better delete this, like NOW. And that's just what I did.  So here is the bedroom set:

I AM IN LOVE.  It's just so gorgeous (to me).  Honestly, we were long over due for a new bed. It's been the bed that Michael has had since college, maybe even the end of High School. Wow. And did I forget to mention it is a FULL? I'm so so excited to have a Queen bed soon!!  And here is the loveseat we got, very simple, but very comfy:

The pillows are kind of not my taste, but I can always get some fabric and make the DIY fabric pillow cover that I pinned MONTHS ago.

What do you think of our choices? I'm so thrilled and can't wait for it all to get here. Now, I just have to paint my bedroom.  What color walls do you think will go with the set? I don't want them to blend in too much!!

Oh, and our "Together 5 years" anniversary is coming up, so of course I took advantage of a certain surprise sale. . .

Kate Spade Baxter Street Marian.  I'm not sure if it's an older model, but it's not on their website anymore.  It's my business professional bag for work. lol. I hope I like it!

Did you have a good weekend?

Go link up with Biana and write all about it!

August 14, 2014

No pictures, but the story is fun!

Holleeyy shit, has it been seriously a week since I was last here? No apologies, I have been absolutely nutty at work!  I was really funny thinking that I would have time to update every day again starting this week when I should have known my peoples would keep me so busy (with the STUPIDEST shit) that I'd be two seconds away from being admitted to the Rahway Prison.  You know how that goes really, when you are an admin assistant, everything that someone asks you to do, needed to be done yesterday, or 2 weeks ago. Because it's THAT important that I show you how to edit a header in Word, or find a color printer on a MAP for you on our floor. I mean, use your brain cells, go to google and look that shit up! 

I'm settling in, as I gave you a preview the other day, my cutesy little tassels came out so adorable! I know that I must be the talk of the office with all my arts-and-crafts projects in my cube.  I'm okay with this.  It's very pink in here.  This, I am also very okay with.  It feels homey.  It should, shouldn't it? Spending 40 hours here a week is practically my whole life.  So, I should be happy in my space. And that's just what I am. Oh, and by the way if you are thinking of making these tassels after seeing mine, here is my one piece of advice: Don't. 

If you aren't the BEST crafter, just buy them.  There are so many shops on etsy that have them selling between $7-$15 which I think is worth it. Those suckers took 2 1/2 hours of my time away from me, and you know once I start a project, I am hopelessly devoted (to youuuuu) to it.

I wanted to let you know what happened with my Jetta. And then I have a funny story about magazine files and lamps. I sure like to keep it interesting around here.

So, I'm not sure where I left off and quite honestly, I'm too damn lazy to link back to the post, and to even find it.  So I'm going to start by telling you that Mike had to have Triple AAA come to jump the battery/car? I don't know how to explain that...and then he drove it to the dealer.  He told them we wouldn't be paying for this as it was a safety issue.  They kind of didn't answer him, he left it at the dealer, they ordered the part and called him telling him that the cost would be around $350. I said, "Abso-f*cking-lutely NOT!!!, I'm calling VW Customer Care right now and having them take care of this."  So I called, and I believe this was a Tuesday, and they told me they would look into this and get back to me by end of business day Thursday. I said, fine, whatever. Just call me back.  So Thursday rolls around and I get this hoity-toity moron calling me back with a real prissy attitude, if you know what I mean (a man, by the way)... and he's basically the biggest piece of shit I've talked to in my life when dealing with customer service.  Okay, that's somewhat of a lie because I just talked to Queen at AT&T yesterday about cancelling my phone line and she gave me a bunch of sassy-ness on the line... ANYWAY, the customer service man told me that my satisfaction was their (VW) number one priority and what they could offer me is to pay for the part and I would be responsible for the labor costs only! Ohmigod! Yay!  I said, "So what you're telling me, is you are gonna cover a part that is what, the most $50 bucks and then I have to pay the ridiculously inflated labor charges since this is being handled by the VW dealer? That's the best you can do for me? That's ridiculous! This is a safety concern! What if I was at the grocery store and had a screaming baby in my car, what would I do? Drive around until my gas comes out? My key wouldn't COME OUT. Do you understand that? This is crazy!"  Well, he surely didn't like that response, because then he answered me saying "Well ma'am if you don't like this offer, I'd be more than happy to take it away and not give you anything at all."

HOLY F*CK. Are you SERIOUS????

I nearly LOST IT ON THE PHONE. Like I was shaking and my heart was racing like I was hopped up on 10 cups of coffee. I said "Oh my gosh, am I understanding you correctly right now? Did you just offer me something and now you're taking it back, because I'm not happy with the offer? What the hell kind of customer service is this!!!"

"Well, we like to really help our customers, especially those who are out of their warranty period and this is such a great offer that we are willing to cover the part for you! But if you don't like this, this offer will only stand for 24 hours and you need to let us know if you want this or not, Is there anything else I can help you with?"

OH MY GOD!?!?!?! FOR REAL!~?!??

I told him he needs to have the service manager call me ASAP.  Then his response, it gets better:

"Well sorry but I can't make him pick up the phone and call you. I can note this in your file."

I'm done. Absolutely done at this point.  I couldn't believe my ears and I told him how annoyed I was getting by the minute that this phone call was going on. He was the dumbest piece of shit I've ever talked to.

So, after I got off the phone I called Tony Silva the manager up of my VW dealer and went onto leave him a really sarcastic, assholey voicemail.  He called me back 15 minutes later. I told him how rude the customer service agent at VW was and that it was ridiculous.  I explained my case and he said there was nothing he could do.  I said this is bullshit.  Tony, next year when you are calling me to upgrade my vehicle I can guarantee you I won't be back.  I've been a customer with you since 2009, and 2 years ago when you called me about this fantastic offer to trade up my 09 jetta to a new one, I thought to myself, you know what I will continue to go to Freehold.  I liked the service (made sure to give props to Raul my service guy) and let him know it was out of my way to come to Freehold when I live elsewhere.  He really didn't like this so he said "ok, let me look up your records"  Basically he came back saying that he saw I had been a customer since 09, paying my car loan through VW, no late payments, all my service done in Freehold, and that he would be willing to split the cost of labor. SO YEAH. Badda bing, badda boom. I ended up paying ~$115 instead of $350.  I said that was fine. Kept my mouth closed and they fixed the car. 

Holy moley, what a STORY. I know how long it was but I really needed to give you all the details so you could see how frustrating of a time that was for me.  Right before my vacation too, by the way.  What is it with me and cars before vacations? (do you remember I had a small accident on the parkway in my new car right before St. Lucia?) AH!

I decided I'm pulling another Lauren-blog-post-from-last-week and I'll come back tomorrow (I promise) about the story of the lamp and Pink magazine files.  Hint: it's an Ikea story!

August 06, 2014

blogger hiatus

Well hello, hello fabulous friends! Long time no see!

It's been seriously a while since I've been around. And I have a confession, I haven't kept up with your blogs while I've been gone. Shame on me!!! I could come up with a million and one excuses as to why I was absent, but the honest truth is: I was on VACATION!!! And then totally sick in bed for 3 days straight, and back to work Monday and Tuesday after being off a week was completely ridiculous and busy. I was super stressed! I can't wait to blog about my frustrations though :) I know you all love reading complaints. Justtt joshing.  But I really hope you all don't mind if I recap my somewhat-crappy (sad face) experience in Vegas and my sob story about being sick. And work too. Oh, and don't I have to let you know the outcome of the Jetta problem?? Jeez, I really have a lot to update you on!!

But first, speaking of work, remember I vaaaaaguely hinted in THIS post about my new office in work (I dare you to find this "vague statement" it's really hard to find). Well, anyway, the time has come for me to say goodbye to my stupid open cube in work, and HELLLLOOOOOOO WALLED CUBE LIFE in our new office!  We are changing locations (it's only 7 miles away) but I can not begin to tell you how freaking ecstatic I am about this move. Hell, I packed my shit up a week before I left on vacation (okay so I only did it because I knew this week would be shitty catching up while I was out).  Ladies, I am going to have a CUBE that has WALLS, on ALL FOUR SIDES. Do you understand how freaking amazing this is? Here, I'll show you my current desk right now. Actually, shit I can't do that because I forgot my cellphone (dammit!!!)  Ok, I don't think I could get anymore scatterbrained than right now but thank goodness for the old archives because I found this birthday post from last year and I posed a picture of my desk:

So, see how it's got that open ledge (and see where the sign says "Happy" in happy birthday, that's where my desk ends and there is a half wall separating me from my coworker's side).  Can't you see how annoying this is? Because, hello, no privacy. Not that I'm doing anything bad, besides blogging. But I don't blog about bad things so this really doesn't count.  And that short ledge in front of my desk is just a welcome center for people to come and talk to me. But yes, I am soooo soo SOO excited about having four walls that are high, and a HUGE DESK. Holy crap I'm getting the warm and fuzzies just thinking about it. So when I get my "office" really desk, set up, I will blog about that too. Because LET ME TELL YOU i have the cutest accessories known to man kind. Thank you Homegoods, Marshall's and Target (yes I bought that Nate Birkus gold dog tape dispenser)!  

Besides the awesomeness that will be my new workspace, I am now able to get back into a van pool to work! PEOPLE, this is HUGE.  I will have to drive about 15-20 minutes to hop on the van, and then let the snoozing begin! I don't have to drive to work anymore with the crazies! Someone else is going to do that for me! Oh my I'm just so happy!!!

ALSO! Another perk to our new site, there is a day care center!! Now don't get any ideas, but I'm just saying for the FUTURE, should I ever have babies, I'll be able to drop them off at the daycare and go to work and have no issues. 

Come back tomorrow for the installment of my issues with Volkswagen! Can't wait to catch up with you all! I missed you!