No pictures, but the story is fun!

Holleeyy shit, has it been seriously a week since I was last here? No apologies, I have been absolutely nutty at work!  I was really funny thinking that I would have time to update every day again starting this week when I should have known my peoples would keep me so busy (with the STUPIDEST shit) that I'd be two seconds away from being admitted to the Rahway Prison.  You know how that goes really, when you are an admin assistant, everything that someone asks you to do, needed to be done yesterday, or 2 weeks ago. Because it's THAT important that I show you how to edit a header in Word, or find a color printer on a MAP for you on our floor. I mean, use your brain cells, go to google and look that shit up! 

I'm settling in, as I gave you a preview the other day, my cutesy little tassels came out so adorable! I know that I must be the talk of the office with all my arts-and-crafts projects in my cube.  I'm okay with this.  It's very pink in here.  This, I am also very okay with.  It feels homey.  It should, shouldn't it? Spending 40 hours here a week is practically my whole life.  So, I should be happy in my space. And that's just what I am. Oh, and by the way if you are thinking of making these tassels after seeing mine, here is my one piece of advice: Don't. 

If you aren't the BEST crafter, just buy them.  There are so many shops on etsy that have them selling between $7-$15 which I think is worth it. Those suckers took 2 1/2 hours of my time away from me, and you know once I start a project, I am hopelessly devoted (to youuuuu) to it.

I wanted to let you know what happened with my Jetta. And then I have a funny story about magazine files and lamps. I sure like to keep it interesting around here.

So, I'm not sure where I left off and quite honestly, I'm too damn lazy to link back to the post, and to even find it.  So I'm going to start by telling you that Mike had to have Triple AAA come to jump the battery/car? I don't know how to explain that...and then he drove it to the dealer.  He told them we wouldn't be paying for this as it was a safety issue.  They kind of didn't answer him, he left it at the dealer, they ordered the part and called him telling him that the cost would be around $350. I said, "Abso-f*cking-lutely NOT!!!, I'm calling VW Customer Care right now and having them take care of this."  So I called, and I believe this was a Tuesday, and they told me they would look into this and get back to me by end of business day Thursday. I said, fine, whatever. Just call me back.  So Thursday rolls around and I get this hoity-toity moron calling me back with a real prissy attitude, if you know what I mean (a man, by the way)... and he's basically the biggest piece of shit I've talked to in my life when dealing with customer service.  Okay, that's somewhat of a lie because I just talked to Queen at AT&T yesterday about cancelling my phone line and she gave me a bunch of sassy-ness on the line... ANYWAY, the customer service man told me that my satisfaction was their (VW) number one priority and what they could offer me is to pay for the part and I would be responsible for the labor costs only! Ohmigod! Yay!  I said, "So what you're telling me, is you are gonna cover a part that is what, the most $50 bucks and then I have to pay the ridiculously inflated labor charges since this is being handled by the VW dealer? That's the best you can do for me? That's ridiculous! This is a safety concern! What if I was at the grocery store and had a screaming baby in my car, what would I do? Drive around until my gas comes out? My key wouldn't COME OUT. Do you understand that? This is crazy!"  Well, he surely didn't like that response, because then he answered me saying "Well ma'am if you don't like this offer, I'd be more than happy to take it away and not give you anything at all."

HOLY F*CK. Are you SERIOUS????

I nearly LOST IT ON THE PHONE. Like I was shaking and my heart was racing like I was hopped up on 10 cups of coffee. I said "Oh my gosh, am I understanding you correctly right now? Did you just offer me something and now you're taking it back, because I'm not happy with the offer? What the hell kind of customer service is this!!!"

"Well, we like to really help our customers, especially those who are out of their warranty period and this is such a great offer that we are willing to cover the part for you! But if you don't like this, this offer will only stand for 24 hours and you need to let us know if you want this or not, Is there anything else I can help you with?"

OH MY GOD!?!?!?! FOR REAL!~?!??

I told him he needs to have the service manager call me ASAP.  Then his response, it gets better:

"Well sorry but I can't make him pick up the phone and call you. I can note this in your file."

I'm done. Absolutely done at this point.  I couldn't believe my ears and I told him how annoyed I was getting by the minute that this phone call was going on. He was the dumbest piece of shit I've ever talked to.

So, after I got off the phone I called Tony Silva the manager up of my VW dealer and went onto leave him a really sarcastic, assholey voicemail.  He called me back 15 minutes later. I told him how rude the customer service agent at VW was and that it was ridiculous.  I explained my case and he said there was nothing he could do.  I said this is bullshit.  Tony, next year when you are calling me to upgrade my vehicle I can guarantee you I won't be back.  I've been a customer with you since 2009, and 2 years ago when you called me about this fantastic offer to trade up my 09 jetta to a new one, I thought to myself, you know what I will continue to go to Freehold.  I liked the service (made sure to give props to Raul my service guy) and let him know it was out of my way to come to Freehold when I live elsewhere.  He really didn't like this so he said "ok, let me look up your records"  Basically he came back saying that he saw I had been a customer since 09, paying my car loan through VW, no late payments, all my service done in Freehold, and that he would be willing to split the cost of labor. SO YEAH. Badda bing, badda boom. I ended up paying ~$115 instead of $350.  I said that was fine. Kept my mouth closed and they fixed the car. 

Holy moley, what a STORY. I know how long it was but I really needed to give you all the details so you could see how frustrating of a time that was for me.  Right before my vacation too, by the way.  What is it with me and cars before vacations? (do you remember I had a small accident on the parkway in my new car right before St. Lucia?) AH!

I decided I'm pulling another Lauren-blog-post-from-last-week and I'll come back tomorrow (I promise) about the story of the lamp and Pink magazine files.  Hint: it's an Ikea story!

a post about sloppy joe.

Sloppy Joe as in the food, not the man.

First and foremost, for those of you who have been around since The LO Down, I apologize in advance if you've read this.  So, I deleted that blog and all of its contents back when I created the Peanut Program.  (Stupid. My writing was seriously hilar) and I was trying to tidy up my home computer last night and came across this (what I thought was funny) post about my day and eating Sloppy Joes.

Here we go: This post was written December 20, 2012. So it was highly likely it was posted to the LO Down.  As I mentioned before, sorry if you read this...but now I have a new crowd around these parts so let's give them a taste of good old sourpuss Lauren from 2012. (Oh, for some reason the entire post is in lowercase. Please forgive me, I don't write that way!)

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Title: I just wanted to eat my sloppy joe.

So I'm on my merry way home from work, when a local NJ radio station brings up the topic "do you give a courtesy wave when someone let's you in/go during traffic?" oh you bet you bottom dollar i called in.  did i get through? no, i didn't. so naturally i had steam coming out of my ears, because i myself at that very moment let someone in, on the parkway of course, and i did NOT GET A WAVE. Yes!! This IRKS the SHIZNAT out of me. i mean for real, doesn't anyone have manners anymore? anyway, the majority of people agreed that they give the "wave", but did you really expect to hear some fool phone in saying they don't do that?

Reminds me of that episode of Seinfeld: The Good Samaritan. ha.

"Oh there’s a guy trying to get in front of me, he has to ask permission. Yes. Go ahead. Get in, get in."
"Did you get a thank you wave?"
"No, nothing. How could you not give a thank you wave? Hey buddy! Where’s my thank you wave?……Give me that wave!"

Anyway, I made it home and was so very excited to have my left over sloppy joe for dinner.  I was practically thinking about it all day long in work. I opted not to bring for lunch, as i figured re-heating on the actual stove vs. the microwave would make it 100x better.  

first, i go in the fridge, and notice the roll i had out yesterday is gone. it now resides in the garbage. (thanks, M!)

thats OK i GUESS, because i know i have more rolls in the freezer.  so i go to the freezer, and pull out the rolls.  the first one i pick has mold on it. great. i thoroughly inspect all of the other rolls, and 3 out of 5 have mold on them.  when the hell did this happen? they were in the freezer. how did they get mold spots? so i was left with the two reject rolls that would have been my last choice.

i pop them in the microwave under "reheat" setting. rookie mistake. i let it go for a good minute, but i thought if its on the reheat setting, it wouldn't be as powerful and hot.  wrong.  i got them out of the microwave and those stupid rolls were like rubber balls. i then decided maybe i could maybe make them less rubbery, but putting them in the oven. so thats just what i did.

now while they were un-rubberizing themselves in the oven, i heated up the sloppy joe. and boy was it delish.

finally the rolls are crisping up and i decided it is about time to take them out and eat. my tongue was practically hanging out of my mouth salivating at this point. i grabbed some chips and loaded them up on my plate, sliced open the two rolls and scooped in my sloppy joe. great! i'm so excited!

next, instead of sitting at the dinner table, like i probably should have done, i went into the back room and decided to use a little wooden folding side table (i purchased it in walmart for like $10.00). now, keep in mind, i already had the plate in my hand, and i'm not sure why i did this but i put the plate on this table and attempted to move it to be infront of me as i sat on the couch. what happened? the stupid ass table leg (its like a criss-cross underneath that slides) slipped, and the entire table fell AWAY from me. the sloppy joe went a-sliding right off the table, right ONTO THE CARPET. SLOPPY JOE. ON THE CARPET. "F--K!" i screamed on the top of my lungs.  i'm pretty sure my neighbors heard me but at this point i don't care. so really, orange, ground beef, in my carpet. if that's not disgusting, i don't know what is.

my damn cats decided they wanted to walk THROUGH the mess and track it over various places on the floor. i tried picking up the pieces as best as i could. in this process, i got sloppy joe knee prints, and orange grease on my hands. what the hell, right? all i wanted was this g-d damn sloppy joe. i ended up still having the steamer that my mother in law let me borrow (from when i steamed the carpets for the party in the beginning of the month).  it didn't help, so long story short, my back room now smells like sloppy joe + there is a big orange stain on the ugly rug.

and to top things off, i burnt my popcorn. not the burnt popcorn that i like, but literally black inside the bag.

yay :)

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Please pretend to like this story because I honestly find it so silly.  I just love how irritated I get over the dumbest things. But in my defense, this was so the opposite of dumb and totally frustrating.  At least a year and a half later I can laugh about it :)

P.S. That rug is long gone by the way, many wine and beer spills.  What can I say, that room in the back is for rowdy gatherings.

facebook.

Well guys, I did it.  I can honestly say that I've started to curb my addiction to......

FACEBOOK!

Now don't think I've quit cold turkey.  I just deleted my app on my iphone.  I can't continue to leave in on there, it's too tempting to constantly log in and get easily annoyed.

Simply put: I hate facebook.

1. Health posts promoting products

• It Works! Wrap thing
• Nutribullet recipes (i.e. juicing -- don't get me wrong, I'm all for you fitness nuts who love juicing. I don't need to see this on my newsfeed CONSTANTLY)
• P90X shit
• some other insert company join me, become a health coach with me! stuff
• Inspirational fitness quotes. I go to pinterest for these, not my newsfeed

2. Political Rants

• It's unecessary
• Teachers vs. Gov Chris Christie
• anything about the Bridgegate scandal
• obama and his healthcare act
• anything political

3. Shared posts (with the exception of a video I shared the other day "Look Up")

• "Like" this photo, if I get 3,000 likes my mom will let me eat fast food tonight!
• random articles about nostalgic 80's things or "where are they now" articles
• SHARE THIS NOW TO SEE A GIANT SHARK DEVOUR THE CAPTAIN OF THIS SHIP!
• WATCH THIS FOR AN UNBELEIVABLE CAR CRASH
• SEE THIS PERSON FALL DOWN AN ESCALATOR WITH 80 STEPS
• Click "like" if you remember having "X" (skip it, blow a balloon from a small straw with gum shit)
• you get my point

4. Baby pictures being posted every hour, on the hour

• Watch out girls, he's on the loose! (for when that little baby boy starts walking)
• Sally JUST used the potty! (insert photo of shit here)
• Strolling at the park today wearing my shades!
• Mommy and Me starbucks date!

5. Sponsored Ad Posts

• How did facebook know to show me the exact purse I was browsing 3 days ago?
• Progessive auto insurance. I don't need you, I have geico thank you
• Celebrate May in a new Chevrolet! NO. 

6. Instagram photos

• I follow you on instagram for a reason. I don't need to see your pictures on both platforms
• stop confusing me! which one do I like? Facebook or instagram! do I like both? does that make me look pathetic?! 

7. Posts that show up a week later that is already in my memory as "seen that, done that" just because someone late to the game commented.  Please don't reopen this annoying nuisance of notifications every time someone starts to comment, AGAIN, a WEEK LATER!

8. Vague status updates

• Don't go posting "ugh, bad day" and then have everyone + their mothers (because they are on FB now) comment, "whats wrong!!!" and then YOU NOT RESPOND. Come on jerk, we are on FB for one reason, and one reason only, to lurk on everyone's business so you might as well just tell us.
• Not to mention, they are just stupid and you are calling for attention (which we gladly provide in order to figure out what the hell is wrong) just stop.

So basically, 8 (pretty common) things that I hate about facebook, and have decided that I no longer need to waste my iPhone battery on.  I rarely see anything good anymore.  I haven't removed the app from my ipad, and obviously I can still access from the computer, but damn, it feels good to be a gangsta.

What are some things you HATE (yes I said it) about Facebook?

is it too early for a glass of wine?

I just had the most frustrating phone screen interview of my life just 2 minutes ago.

Twenty Five Minutes of pure torture!

At this point, I don't even want to go on the interview (if they even offer, which I'm sure they won't because I couldn't even answer some easy ass questions!)

Besides being mildly unprepared (like having a list of my current duties, short/long term goals), I'd like to mention that the recruiter was a complete bitch.  She was so snippy, fast-talking, SO NOT ENCOURAGING bitch.  I've done phone interviews before.  I know what to expect. She was the complete opposite of what I was expecting.

She probably was pissed I didn't answer her phone call the first time.  Ok, it showed up like this on my iphone: "Uknown 312915415010" Really? What the hell kind of number is that?  I thought it was an international number calling me because Mike recently got a phone call from TAIWAN. WHAT? (Yes that really did happen). Anyway, thank god she left her phone number in the voicemail. I called back IMMEDIATELY and said my name, and really fast paced she replied "WHO DIS? OH. The Phone Screen. K." and then we moved on our merrily way (or not).

I've been on phone screen interview calls before...we all get flustered, it's only natural.  And it's only natural to be ENCOURAGING and soft-voiced and nice to the person who's obviously flustered as hell, instead of being all like "you whack bitch you talkin bout movin to 'notha company so tell me wut your short-term GOALS ARE BIOTCH!"  Ok, so she didn't call me a bitch but the way I typed out that statement is exactly how she sounded.

So anyway, she wrapped up the phone call with a "Good luck and Happy Holidays! mmmbye" and that was that.

Thank god that shit is OVER.  At this point she's ruined it for me and I don't even want to be offered an interview.  But I'm betting you all one penny that I don't get one anyway.

Where's the riesling?

It's Tuesday.

It's Tuesday...that's pretty wild. All day yesterday since I was off, I felt like it was Sunday. And this morning and all day today, I've felt as if it was Wednesday.

Don't you hate days like that?

Why don't you sit right down and I'll begin where I left off yesterday....

I was off to make my cookies. Without parchment paper.  No big deal, I have these fancy schmancy cookie baking sheets so I'll be fine.  Right? Right!

I gathered all of my ingredients and tools.  I did the trusty trick with a butter* knife to get the flour measured., over the bag of flour where you pat it down to press it in, and then "shave" it off as you swipe the straight edge part of the butter knife across the cup to make an even line of the flour. Putting my home-ec skills from HS to good use!  I would say about 95% of the excess flour made it to my counter top and floor*.  Same thing happened with the powdered sugar.  It was time for me to take a shortcut with softening my butter now.  Recently I saw a really exciting pinterest trick about "grating butter"with a cheese grater. Well i don't know who the HELL came up with that idea but it's a completely bogus MESS...So I popped it in the microwave and it ended up basically becoming liquid butter EVEN ON HALF POWER.  You know when you dump liquid butter into the mix, the cookies don't turn out right.  Whatever, moving forward.  I get my KitchenAid hand mixer and start mixing away.  This recipe called for the powdered sugar and butter to get light and fluffy after about 5 minutes of mixing.  Well, let me tell you my arm was getting tired and that shit wasn't getting fluffy.  By the way. My idiotic kitchenaid hand mixer was made for RIGHT HANDED PEOPLE.  Now don't get me wrong, I am a right-handed woman however being right-handed, that means I also like to swipe around the mixing bowl with the spatula with my right hand while beating with my left. So why in SAM'S HELL IS THE WIRE COMING OUT OF THE RIGHT BACK SIDE OF THE HAND MIXER AND NOT THE CENTER BACK??

STUPID.

Well if you have one of these mixers, you know how long the cord is. In case you don't, use your imagination with the picture above.  So if I am handmixing with my left hand and its plugged in, you can CERTAINLY imagine how ANNOYING this long as cord is as you are beating and its practically lying in your mixture. Don't you think the cord should be in the center of the back? To be universally even for both lefties and righties???? Ugh, moving on. Long story short: the cookies came out great, and I ate 3 of them within 10 minutes and had to stop myself from eating more since they are for the cookie exchange. OH, and my best friend confirmed her mom was making basically the same exact cookies as I already did. WIN. ARGH. Good think I'm oh-so-generous and making more cookies tonight (even though I REALLY don't want to right now).

By this point I was in need of a good-old fashioned nap. That didn't happen.  That box of goodies that was waiting to be shipped to OK was calling my name. I got up and went to the post office by the corner store, it was 3:30pm and busy as EVER.  The line was TWICE as LONG as it was in the morning and I just couldn't leave again and chance driving across town to the other post office...lord knows those idiots would have been on a lunch break or picking their nose with a be back later sign.  I got on line and some old man decided he was going to count out every single dollar bill he owned right behind me in my ear. You know that noise...when you count money fast, it makes that "pfft" noise. Well times that by maybe 20 or so bills. I did one of those sly turn my head over my shoulder behind me looks and then sighed out loud.  He continued with the bill counting so obviously he isn't good at reading signals. I got the crap mailed and I'm shocked that "parcel post" will take 8 whole days to get there.  Well thankgoodness I got to the post office when I did or else i'd have to pay for expedited shipping!!

Later: Mike was coming home from work late so it was decided that I would eat dinner without him.  I started dinner and had a recipe that called for baking potatos for 40 minutes so I decided, ya know what? What the hell, let me throw together that Lowe's bookshelf and get that all set up. HOLY MOLY. If I wasn't so damn lazy, I'd take my fuming fingers to lowes.com website and rate it THE ABSOLUTE WORST BOOKSHELF TO PUT TOGETHER ALONE EVER. Now, I am a handy (wo)man.  Putting shelves together like this is a piece of cake...or so I thought. 2 splinters and callouses later, the shelf is put together and I think I just worked off the 3 cookies from earlier.  I was so wiped out, cursing and fuming that I decided that piece of shit was going in our backroom and it was the Kohl's bookshelf's time to shine in the front room.  Screw you Lowe's bookshelf. 

So longest story ever short: The cookies were good, the gifts were mailed out, and the bookshelf is put together.

*I wouldn't be lying when I told you my cats had to walk through all the flour on the floor too. Those darn cats.

productive mondays :)

You know when you wake up in the morning thinking you are going to have the most productive day ever?  Silly are we to actually believe that will happen.

I woke up this morning feeling extra frisky, so I decided to take the day off today.  I'm hosting a Cookie Exchange on Thursday so I figured I would get a head start on baking, mail out Christmas gifts for my brother & family, put together a new bookcase that we bought over the weekend for our living room reno project, and just enjoy a Monday off.

It  actually started with me waking up this morning feeling really wiped out.  I never sleep on Sundays and last night wasn't the exception. And Mike's alarm clock ringing off the hook since 3:30am didn't help either (he goes to the gym in the AM before work).  But he tends to be a snoozer, big time. And it gets to the point where I'm yelling (probably in my sleep) "TURN THAT SHIT OFF OR ELSE I'LL KILL YOU!" Okay, not really, but yeah really.

He came back from the gym and I was still in my slumber dreaming about turnpike car crashes (thank god I woke up from that one) and he started my coffee for me.  What a guy.  So the amazing aroma of a fresh pot of coffee was good enough to get my ass up at 6:30 this morning.

So I had my two cups of coffee and off I began to my big productive day.  Well, first strike, is my bathroom is closer than usual so of course coffee makes me pee like crazy (TMI? Get over it.) so there's time out every time that happens.  Then I was off to find a box to mail the gifts out to OK in.  Well, there's no issue with that because I have eleventy hundred boxes in my garage because I may just be a box hoarder. Ask me if any of them fit? Well, none of them fit. Come ON. Freaking stamp kit for my niece is to blame with it's odd box size.  So then I put the stuff in two boxes and decided, screw that I'm not paying double shipping to mail this stuff out (grinch- I know, but shipping isn't cheap!).  So I resorted back to the first of five boxes I tried and squeezed that shit in like you wouldn't believe.  I wrestled with this box closing it, but SUCCESS!! Oh, but before I say success I have to let you know I searched about 15 minutes for my packing tape.  Car, garage, pantry, closets, cube organizers, where do you think it was located? In the kitchen, in the cat's section of cabinets. Who the hell put that there? You bet your bottom dollar it wasn't me!

So now that we've established that I'm peeing every 5 minutes, and it took me about a 1/2 hour combined to find tape, boxes and put the box together, now it's time to move onto the post office shenanigans.

First I stopped by the corner store where I get my dollar coffee on some mornings.  There is a small post office in the plaza and I should have known better to go there.  But anyway I parked in the busy lot and started my walk to the post office.  Those sneaky bastards have mirrored windows so you can't see how many people are standing on line in a cramped little room. There were TEN PEOPLE on the line at freaking 9 am in the morning. Don't you people have work? What the hell!  So I didn't even make it in there before saying "oh hellll no" and walked out.  Little do I know that I look like the idiot as I burn rubber getting out of that parking lot and thinking I'm smarter than everyone I'll just go to the Chambersbridge post office!! Well, I hit every. single. light. getting there which added an extra 10 minutes of travel time when it should have been 5...oh and behind bratty children in school buses.  Seriously, what schools transport their students at 9:15 in the morning? Shouldn't they be there already? Anyway, I got to the post office oh-so-excitedly because I noticed there were only a few cars in the lot! SCORE! Ha, those idiots by the corner store...they'll be waiting for hours, ha HA!  I walk in with my big box and a grin on my face to find that the post office doesn't open till TEN A.M.  WHAT THE FLIPPITY EFF. I stomped out of there annoyed to bits thinking I'd just wait in my car. Oh no, it was only 9:17am at this point.  So 10 minutes later (hit every light AGAIN) I'm sitting home writing this blog post.

Maybe I'll go bake my first set of cookies.  Knowing my track record this morning, I'll end up burning the bottoms.

Wish me luck!

P.S. Now that I think about it, I'm already screwed with the burning bottoms..I'm out of parchment paper!

somebody's gotta do it.

I strongly suggest you leave this page if you are not interested in hearing me bitch and complain for about 3 minutes or however long it will take you to read this post.

You've been warned.

Pumpkin Spice Lattes - #PSL
Honestly, when the HELL did these disgusting drinks become so popular? Last fall I saw them creeping their way into the candle business and blogger business, but this year, EVERYWHERE is Pumpkin Spice this or that (candles, airfresheners, hand soaps, muffins, donuts, car scents). And at least 7 times per day, am I seeing someone take a picture of their starbucks #PSL with a shot of the "arm candy party" or whatever the heck those fashionistas are calling it, a pair of shoes and a shot of their pants on INSTAGRAM.  With 800 hashtags, you know how I feel about those hashtags.  Seriously though, after blogging last fall, I decided to give the Pumpkin spice a fair shot, I couldn't even get past the first sip.  I will take the hot apple cider, please and thank you.

eBay and their inflating iPhone prices.
Really though, who in Sam's hell gets the idea they can sell a TOTALLY SMASHED CRACKED SCREEN iphone 4 --> FOUR (not even 4S) people, for over TWO HUNDRED DOLLARS?? WHAT? Stop now. Just no.  I decided that I've had it with my Galaxy S4, and I've been searching on eBay for a used iPhone 5...the prices are beyond RIDICULOUS.  Like, I'm talking over $500 dollars, in an auction price. You don't even want to know what the "Buy it Now" price is.   Who the hell do these people think they are selling those phones at those whacked out prices? And even more so, who the hell would spend that much money on a USED phone?  P.S. I kept coming across the title *BAD ESN*... I googled this and found that these scam artists are selling their phones for an obscene amount of money, they are within their return period, and then reporting to the phone companies that their phones were stolen!  Which basically means, they are making about $300 bucks off the phone (given that they paid $200 for the new contract), and then getting a brand new phone for FREE. Jerks.

Bloggers and their Phillip Lim for Target purses.
This one really pisses me off.
First of all, I'd like to give a big thank you to all the bloggers who have successfully bought out all of the Phillip Lim purses, by the approximate hour of 8am on Sunday, September 15th in EVERY Target across America as well as their online website.  Really, I congratulate you for your Black Friday-esque plans of attack on these bags.  Is it me, or do you feel every blogger (but me and maybe you) have these purses?? People, really though, what was the big deal with these bags? They aren't even real leather, and its a PURSE FOR CRYING OUT LOUD.   GET OVER IT!  In fact, I'm so riled up about the hype and aftermath of these purses that I hope your damn strap breaks and you have to return it to the store and then you'll be shit out of luck because they are all gone. (And I can promise you--this is not jealousy, AT ALL..before you even start thinking that).
And a note to those of you who purchased 800 of them in one shopping spree, and are now selling them on eBay (curiosity got the best of me), at RIDICULOUS PRICES, WHO DO YOU THINK YOU ARE?!?!?  Shit like that should be illegal, I'm sorry.  And for those of you people who actually buy ANYONE's TARGET BAG on Ebay or instagram, or wherever the hell else these people are selling them, for anything more than $10 dollars more than the original price... you are dumb. 

The End.


Now that I've gotten that crap off my chest, I can blog about how fabulous my weekend was.

Or not.

I'm choosing not to, because quite frankly, it sucked.  And the Giants lost. REAL BAD. I was actually ashamed to be wearing a shirt with their name on it in the store after the game.

However, I am excited for Sleepy Hollow though tonight.  Did anyone watch or DVR it? It was very interesting and creepy!  

Have a great day ladies.